Dear dermaE Flash Relief Cooling and Calming Creme:
Thank you. Two nights now, I’ve massaged your heavenly scented whipped creme onto the areas recommended for night sweat relief: my chest, inner wrists, upper arms, and thighs. Night One, I sweated less than usual; last night, not a drop of salty dew disrupted my sleep nor dampened my nightie.
I grabbed you off the market shelf–the last one–in desperation. Night after night after night of bad dreams capped off with soaked jammies stuck to legs, chest, and back upon waking, shivering as I peeled everything off to pat myself dry. I found myself jealous of a friend’s imminent hysterectomy. I wanted a hysterectomy, too; no matter if my useless reproductive system wasn’t the cause of this growing annoyance.
Maybe someday I’ll sweat in bed for the right reasons; for now, I’m happy enough to feel you all over my body.