Greenwald’s telling it like it is in the 21st century dating world. Can’t fault her for that. Of course, she’s a professional dating coach/matchmaker so she has her “make or break” 1st dating to-do’s and don’ts’. I recognize traits in myself within the 16+ negative stereotypes men (mis)perceive in women that keep them from asking for a second. All women would. If she (and the men she interviewed) made it sound like men are picky, it’s because they are. They can afford to be–as of 2008, I think, there were 20 million more single women than men in the US.
And that’s what makes me sad while reading this; women have been and will always be at a disadvantage as regards dating, but in other areas of life, too. Yes, we’ve freedom that women in Africa, the Middle East, and Egypt lack. I’m not comparing our situation to the deplorable treatment of women in other parts of the world. I’m just saying “we’ve come a long way, baby” and still have to “tweak,” tone down, dress more femininely , edit our actions, gestures, words, and personalities to peak a man’s interest enough for a second date.
That being said, I’m keeping an open mind about it. I made notes about traits that could put men off me and the “tweaks” to use in bettering my chances of getting a call-back. See, it seems desperate. And I’m not. As a person who needs to be around people, I’m alone too much and often lonely. I thrive around others. And the reasons behind this and resulting behavior that scares off men go deeper than being “desperate.” I don’t want kids. I don’t want to remarry.
Anyways, I’m thrilled that It’s Not You is waiting for me at the library. I’ve carried and tossed out a lot of baggage already; excuse the lack of excitement in shouldering all the blame for a bad first date, too.