WELL, IT’S SATURDAY NIGHT AND I AIN’T GOT NOBODY

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(Photo: Daniela Treymann)

Yep. Just popped into my head. That’s genius at work for you.

Spent the afternoon in Bethesda. Two days ago, this genius walked out of the coffee shop after a trip to the loo, leaving a book and a few magazines on her table (and her trash; embarrassing). The friendly staff were kind enough to place them behind the counter to await my imminent return today. Quartermaine Coffee brews fair trade organic coffee, Starbucks. And offers two vegan smoothies. AND…offers a free rewards program sans a plastic card. Seems their software keeps track of purchases and lets them know when you’re due free stuff. Imagine that.

Anyhoo, hopped the Metro back to my neighborhood, bought a few groceries, and talked to my apostle, John, before heading home. The weather gurus issued a thunderstorm warning; to be honest, it disappointed. Nice to think the front dragged the day’s intense heat with it, but let’s face it. This is DC, so the weather’s probably been bought out by Big Energy lobbyists. The rain’s nasty here, too, as in poison. Caught in a raging downpour a few months back, it burned my eyes till I could barely see. Not good when crossing roads in rush hour traffic. Looked in the mirror after hauling my soaked, semi-blind self into the apartment: at my dopey highest my eyes never achieved this level of bloodshottedness. Seriously, dude. “Devil possessed Linda Blair in The Exorcist” eyes.

Hell yeah, I filter my drinking water. Do they make shower head filters, ’cause a naked woman with RA standing in a wet bathtub shaving her legs needs fully functioning peepers. I’m rinsing my body with acid rain, people.

OK, adding it to my list. Someone’s gonna pay.  

Lack of communication is unhealthy.

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